{"id":1125,"date":"2019-02-12T23:29:09","date_gmt":"2019-02-13T04:29:09","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/read.whitefire-publishing.com\/?p=1125"},"modified":"2020-06-01T09:07:07","modified_gmt":"2020-06-01T13:07:07","slug":"a-soft-breath-of-wind","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/whitefire-publishing.com\/read\/a-soft-breath-of-wind\/","title":{"rendered":"A Soft Breath of Wind"},"content":{"rendered":"\n
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A Soft Breath of Wind<\/h3>\n\n\n\n

Sequel to A Stray Drop of Blood<\/em><\/a><\/p>\n\n\n\n

by Roseanna M. White<\/a><\/p>\n\n\n\n

A gift that has branded her for life<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Zipporah is thirteen when the Spirit descends upon her, opening her eyes to a world beyond the physical goings-on of the villa outside Rome she has always called home. Within hours, she learns what serving the Lord can cost. Forever scarred after a vicious attack, she knows her call is to use this discernment to protect the Way. She knows she must serve the rest of her life at Tutelos, where the growing Roman church has congregated. She knows her lot is set.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Yet is it so wrong to wish that her master, the kind and handsome young Benjamin Visibullis, will eventually see her as something more than a sister in Christ? Is it so wrong to dream of seeing the world?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Samuel Asinius, adoptive son of a wealthy Roman, has always called Benjamin brother. When their travels take them to Jerusalem for Passover, the last thing he expects is to cross paths with the woman who sold him into slavery as a child\u2013the mother he long ago purged from his heart. His sister, Dara, quickly catches Benjamin\u2019s eye, but Samuel suspects there is something dark at work.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

When Dara, a fortune-teller seeking the will of a shadowy master determined to undermine the Way, comes into the path of Zipporah, a whirlwind descends upon them all.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Only the soft wind of the Spirit can heal their scars\u2026with a love neither divination nor discernment could foresee.<\/p>\n<\/div><\/div>\n\n\n\n

\n\t\t\t\t\t

Chapter 1<\/span><\/span><\/h3>\n\t\t\t\t\t

Her sister was the\nmost beautiful woman in the world. Zipporah handed the bridal veil to their\nmother and then scooted back, out of the way. Anna sat before the polished\nbronze mirror, smiling as their mother draped the translucent white cloth over\nher face.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Samuel would be\ntongue-tied when he spotted his bride, Zipporah was sure. He would look at Anna\nin that way he did, with his heart in his eyes, that patient love on his face.\nThey would stand together before all of Rome\u2019s nobles\u2014Anna, the just-freed slave\nand Samuel, the adopted-Asinius\u2014and they would be the most beautiful couple\never to pledge their lives to each other.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Ima adjusted the\nfabric, but her smile grew strained. \u201cAre you certain you are ready, Anna? They\nwill judge you. You must know they will.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cIma.\u201d Anna turned\non the wooden stool and gripped their mother\u2019s fingers. \u201cSamuel was a slave\nonce too, and now he is a joint-heir with Abigail and Titus\u2019s other children.\nWhy should they judge him for marrying me?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

They would not,\nwhen they beheld her beauty. How could they? They would whisper, perhaps, but\none could not help the whispers.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Still\u2026it sounded so\nstrange to hear Anna call them Abigail and Titus, with\nno \u201cmistress\u201d or \u201cmaster\u201d before their names. How much stranger would it be if\nshe began calling them Father and Mother, as Samuel did?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Zipporah backed up\nanother step and reached behind her for the cool stone of the wall. Her sliding\nfingers moved into empty space. The window. She turned and pulled open the\nlattice just enough to see out without showing the world what lay within.\nFlowers\u2019 perfume teased her nose. The sun streamed down, warm and steady and\u2026so\nvery bright. It seemed brighter than usual.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Perhaps even the\nheavens would celebrate with Anna and Samuel this day.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Zipporah closed her\neyes, drew in a long breath, and sent a prayer for them winging upward. They\nwould be happy. They must be happy. Anna had never\nwanted anything but to be Samuel\u2019s wife, and he had never loved anyone but her.\nPlease, Lord God. Please bless them. Bless their day. Bless\ntheir union.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

A laugh brought\nZipporah\u2019s eyes open again and made her throat close off. The bridegroom was\nexiting the wedding tent, the sun gleaming off his golden curls and garnering\nthe eye of many a guest. But it was not Samuel, beautiful as any statue of\nApollo in Rome, who made her stomach go tight. It was not Samuel who laughed,\nbut the eldest of his younger brothers.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Her fingers knotted\nthrough the lattice. Benjamin. She pulled back a bit, behind the shadow of the\nshutter. If he saw her, he would pretend he did not. Look the other way. Ignore\nher very existence, as he had done for months. And it would slice as it always\ndid.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Her fault. She knew\nit, but what was she to do? She did not mean to look\nat him so that the whole world knew her heart. She did not mean to make things\nso awkward every time they were in the same room. She did not mean for anyone\nto tease him because of her\naffections.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

They did. She knew\nthey did, though she had never heard the exact words. Well could she imagine them\nthough\u2014the other young men in their late teens or early twenties jabbing an\nelbow into his side and saying, Are you ever going to take\npity on ugly little Zipporah?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Samuel glanced her\nway. He probably hoped for a glimpse of Anna, but no disappointment clouded his\nfeatures when he spotted Zipporah instead. He grinned at her and kept on\nwalking. Just an hour ago he had drawn her into a hug and said how glad he was\nto be gaining her as a sister. He had clapped a hand to Mark\u2019s shoulder and\nsaid how another brother was always welcome.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Zipporah could\nagree with that. Even as she called herself a fool for wishing he became her\nbrother through her marriage someday, not just Anna\u2019s.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

But Benjamin\nVisibullis would never want Zipporah. Even were her face as perfect as her\nsister\u2019s\u2026even if her figure someday developed into more than a stick\u2026even were\nshe born free and wealthy like the noble women flocking the villa\u2019s grounds\ntoday, still he would not want her. He was too good to\nput stock in superficial things. Too good to judge on social station or status.\nHe just\u2026did not like her so well, despite all the dreams they shared of the\nwide world beyond the villa of Tutelos. Of spreading the good news of salvation\nto the nations. He may go someday, but not with her by\nhis side as she wished every night.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

They disappeared\naround the corner of the house, and Zipporah closed her eyes again. Father God, please take this desire from me. I beg you. Fill me\ninstead with your Spirit. A tingle swept up her spine. She had prayed it\nthis morning too, had prayed it every day for months. She was thirteen, nearly\nthe age when a woman was expected to marry and start a family<\/a>. But she did not\nwant to be promised to some man who would not even want her, who would wish she\nwere her sister instead. She wanted to go, to spread\nher wings and fly the world over. To be like Paul or Timothy or Silas,\npreaching and teaching and making disciples.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Perhaps if she cut\noff her hair and wore the dress of a man. She pressed her lips against a\ngiggle. Anna and Ima would be horrified at her even thinking such a thing.\nThough she could probably pass as a boy. She could stow away on one of Master\nTitus\u2019s ships and\u2026and\u2026<\/p>\n\n\n\n

No.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

She drew back from\nthe window, pulling the lattice closed with her. The Lord did not often speak\nso clearly to her. Why he had to now, when she was only daydreaming\u2026but she\nshoved those stray thoughts down, away, and drew in a long breath. I will not, Lord. I promise. I only want purpose. I want to serve\nyou. But I would never run away. Just show me how to serve, please. Show me\nwhat you have for me. Show me\u2026please, Lord, show me yourself.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

She had prayed\nthose words this morning too, as the brethren were gathered for morning\nprayers. Her eyes had been squeezed shut, her face tilted upward.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Then her father had\nput a hand on her shoulder. Perhaps he spoke in his prayer language, words she\ncould not understand\u2014or perhaps her ears had been too filled with the strange,\ncrystalline song to know what he spoke. But she had felt it, that rush of wind\nthe others had spoken of. That lick of fire through her middle.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

She had felt the\nSpirit before when the church gathered, but always as a pressure, a lifting.\nLike she was just one member on a boat bobbing along on a sea, swelling when\nthe others swelled, dropping when the others dropped.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

This, though, had\nbeen different. Summer\u2019s sun compared to a candle\u2019s flame. A whirlwind compared\nto the gentlest breeze. The force of it had brought her to her knees and, when\nthat had not been enough, down still more until her face pressed against the\ncool mosaic tiles.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

The song had filled\nher. She had never heard the like, could name no instrument that sounded so\nsweet, nor could human voice ever raise such glorious strains. It had filled\nher, consumed her, seemed to lift her up higher the more she pressed herself to\nthe floor. Hands splayed against the tiles, all else had ceased to exist.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

But then she had\nrisen, and the world had all come rushing back. It was her sister\u2019s wedding\nday, and too many tasks awaited for her to dwell, to bask in whatever it had\nbeen. Even so. The lamps looked brighter. The sun shone as it never had. Her\nears perked up, waiting for another wisp of that song.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Her mother smiled\ninto the mirror at Anna\u2019s reflection. \u201cThere. Perfect.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Perfect. Zipporah smiled too. In another hour, her sister would be Anna\nAsinius, wife to a man who would love her all his days. Who would look at her\nwith complete adoration, as his little brother would never do to Zipporah. She\nknew it. Knew it as certainly as she knew the sun would rise the next morning.\nBenjamin Visibullis would never want her. She knew it.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

It just hit harder\ntoday than usual.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

You\nare enough for me, Lord. More words she had said\nbefore. But never before had the memory of that song still filled her. Never before\nhad her spirit still felt so strong from the breath of his wind. Never before\nhad she meant them so fully.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

A knock sounded on\nthe door, and Zipporah scurried to open it. She expected to find Mistress\nAbigail on the other side, as she had promised to return shortly.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

And indeed, there\nshe stood, nearly as beautiful as Anna. Today Rome would remember why\nBenjamin\u2019s father had risked his future to marry Mistress Abigail, though she\nhad been but a slave. Today Rome would remember why, after Jason Visibullis\u2019s\ndeath, Titus Asinius had fallen in love with her and married her despite his\nfather\u2019s ire.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

The mistress smiled\nand reached out to tuck away the curl that was always falling onto Zipporah\u2019s\ncheek.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Zipporah opened the\ndoor wider, noting her father was there too, behind their mistress. \u201cI think\nshe is almost ready.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cGood.\u201d But\nMistress Abigail took Zipporah\u2019s arm and pulled her out into the hall rather\nthan stepping into the room. \u201cBut before the wedding begins, we need you for a\nmoment, Zipporah.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

They needed her? Zipporah lifted her brows, aiming the question at her\nabba. \u201cDoes Sarah need something?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Mistress Abigail\nlaughed. \u201cShe has made a mess of herself chasing the younger children around,\nbut that is a hopeless cause. No, little one, we need to talk to you. Come.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Talk to her? Though both the mistress and her father smiled, still\nher pulse kicked up. Never in her thirteen years could she recall a time when\nshe had been summoned for a conversation, unless it were when she had found\nherself in a bit of trouble thanks to her escapades with the other children.\nBut never alone.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Abba slid an arm\naround her shoulders. \u201cIt is nothing to fear, Zip.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cIndeed.\u201d The\nmistress patted her arm and drew her along, down the hall of family bed\nchambers and toward a door that led outside. \u201cYour sister\u2019s wedding has just\nreminded us that we have yet to discuss your future\nwith you.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cOh.\u201d Her stomach\nclenched so suddenly, she nearly doubled over. Would they arrange her marriage now, to some other slave who would curl his lip\nat the thought of her? Or assign her a permanent task, like serving Sarah\u2014not\nthat Zipporah would mind that. Sarah was her dearest friend, but\u2026<\/p>\n\n\n\n

The mistress\u2019s\nfingers ran a soothing line over her forearm. \u201cYou and your siblings are among\nthe few people born slaves here at Tutelos. Many others have accepted our\noffers of freedom. But your parents did not.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Zipporah glanced at\nthe silver ring in her father\u2019s ear, the one he had worn since he was little\nmore than a boy, when he had chosen to serve the Visibullis house for life.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Abba leaned over\nand pressed a kiss to the top of her head as they stepped out into the\nsunlight. \u201cYour mother and I both chose to serve, chose to bind ourselves for\nlife to this family we love like our own. Mark has chosen to serve Benjamin all\nhis days. Anna, though\u2026Anna will tread a very different path.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

The knots in her\nstomach eased, though now her throat went tight. This, then, was their\nintention. They would offer freedom to her today, as they did all their slaves\nat some point or another. She could choose to bind herself to the Visibullis\nhouse with Benjamin as her master, or perhaps to Master Titus\u2019s\nhousehold\u2014separate, though they lived here together on Benjamin\u2019s estate.\nMaster Titus had raised Benjamin as his own son but had always preserved the\nlegacy of Master Jason\u2014his friend and the father Benjamin had never known.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Zipporah could\nchoose to be given papers testifying to her freedom but serve here still, in\nexchange for room and board, as many others had done.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Or she could be free. Free to go wherever she willed.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

No. The word came clearly again, and behind it, above it, she caught an\necho of that song. You are needed here.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Needed? Looking\nover at Mistress Abigail\u2019s serene smile, Zipporah forced a swallow down her\ntight throat. She had never really been needed, not yet. She kept Sarah\ncompany, yes, and brushed her hair, helped her straighten her room. She lent a\nhand in the kitchen or the house when another hand was asked. But needed?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Yes, Lord. I want to\nbe needed. I want to serve you wholly, fully. Use me however you wish\u2026wherever\nyou wish.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Movement caught her\neye. Or rather, a quickly moving light, like the dance of sunshine on glass.\nShe turned her head to follow it but saw nothing. At least, she did not think she saw anything. Just the sun glowing through the\nwater of her eyes.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Was it not?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cHave you put the\nquestion to her?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Zipporah started\nand faced forward again at the voice, his voice.\nBenjamin had joined them in that moment she looked away, and now he stood\ncloser to her than he had in months. Wearing a strained smile, he still managed\nto avoid her gaze.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Oh Lord, help me. I\nbeg you, please.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cWe were just about\nto.\u201d Mistress Abigail smiled at her son and then transferred it to Zipporah.\n\u201cYou have a choice to make, little one. When we purchase slaves at the urging\nof the Spirit or to fill a need, we always make it clear we view it as\npurchasing their freedom. If they do not want to serve here, they may go where\nthey will. If they choose to stay, we welcome them to the flock. Some have\nchosen to remain slaves, like your parents, and so when children are born to\nthem, we wait until they are of age and then let them decide what they will\ndo.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Of\nage. Was she of age? Sometimes, when she dreamed of\nmaking a life with Benjamin, she felt as old as any of the other young women\nnow wives. Other times\u2026times like these\u2026she wished she could hide behind her\nima\u2019s skirts like she had done a few short years ago.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cYou are younger\nthan your siblings were when the decision was put before them,\u201d her father\nsaid, his arm still around her. \u201cBut with Anna marrying Samuel today, becoming\na mistress, it seemed cruel to leave you forced to serve.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

She shook her head\nand refused to let her gaze wander back to Benjamin, even though she wanted to\nsoak up the image of him. \u201cI am never forced to serve, Abba. It is my joy to do\nmy part.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

The mistress\u2019s\nfingers twined through hers. \u201cAnd you are a bit young to be striking out on\nyour own, we know that. But you can have your freedom, Zipporah. Benjamin has\nthe document ready.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Zipporah\u2019s eyes\nwould not obey her command not to look, not now when Benjamin pulled out a\nrolled parchment from his toga. She had to look at the\ndocument, at the strong hand that held it out. And then she could not help but follow\nhis muscled arm up to his handsome face.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

But he did not\noffer her the charming smile he gave everyone else he met, just that same\ntight, distant one he always gave her lately. Gone, it seemed, were the days\nwhere they could laugh together. Where they could wonder together what lay\nbeyond the walls of Tutelos, beyond Rome, in those lands they read about in the\nletters from other churches. Gone was their friendship.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

She had ruined it\nby wanting more. And now he would no doubt be relieved if she took that rolled\nparchment. If she were no longer his in any sense of the word.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Take\nit. The words slid into her ear, nearly sounding\nlike the Spirit had. But they did not resonate as they should. A chill clawed\nat her. Take it and leave. Go see the world. Go. Go and be\nfree.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Her arm lifted, her\nfingers reached out. Then a shadow caught her eye. She jerked her head to the\nright, trying to see what had cast it, but there was nothing that could have.\nNo clouds in the sky to have whispered before the sun. Just a shadow crouching\nbehind her. Like a\u2026like a man. But not.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

She eased closer to\nher father. As alluring as the world sounded, she did not want to see it alone.\nAnd had the Lord not just minutes ago told her to stay here, that she was\nneeded? She let her arm drift back to her side and shook her head. \u201cI will stay\nhere. With my family.\u201d With you, she thought but did\nnot dare to add as she glanced up at her handsome young master.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Benjamin held the\nscroll out farther, nodded. \u201cOf course. But you can still do that and be free.\nIf you choose to bind yourself to my house, Zip, choose it of your own\nvolition, you will be agreeing to be bound by my authority and my will. Do you\nunderstand that?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Like a wife,\npromising to obey her husband. Not that they all did,\nbut a home would not be at peace if two wills were always clashing\u2014and their\nhome, Tutelos, where so many Christians and Jews sought refuge, needed peace\nabove all. She folded her arms across her middle lest she be tempted to reach\nout again. \u201cI understand.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

For just a moment,\nold affection paired with challenge in his eyes, as it had used to do. \u201cYou\nwill have to give up arguing with me.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cI do not argue\nwith you!\u201d The moment the words escaped, she clamped her lips together, even as\ntheir parents laughed.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Benjamin eased a\nstep closer, making him only three steps away. The scroll he held out was\ninches from her. \u201cStay. But be free, Zip.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

But she did not\nwant to be free, not of him. If all the claim she would ever have on him was\nthat he was her master\u2026and really, what was the point? She shook her head. \u201cI\nam a girl, Ben. I am under my father\u2019s authority even if I take that parchment,\nand he is under yours.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

And she could trust\nhim, just as she trusted her parents and his. She could trust him to make wise\ndecisions that she would not chafe under. Trust him to go where the Lord\nwilled.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Go. Take it and go.\nAdventure awaits. The world is at your fingertips. Take it and go discover what\nit has for you.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

The shadow seemed\nto move\u2014no, did move. She saw it slide onto her\nshoulder, and it moved with her when she shrugged. Unease scrabbled its way\ninto fear. What was it?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Then a flash,\nbright and shimmering, and the song leapt through her mind. Gone before she\ncould grasp its words, if there were any. Gone.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

As was the shadow.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

What had it been?\nShadow and light\u2026oily whisper and crystal song. As if\u2026as if\u2026<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cHere.\u201d Benjamin\ntapped her arm with the rolled parchment.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

He had drawn even\ncloser. Her throat went dry, and all she could manage was a shake of her head.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Benjamin sighed.\n\u201cMust you always be so stubborn?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cI am not\nstubborn.\u201d And now she found her tongue?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

His lips twitched\ninto the beginnings of a smile. \u201cYou are arguing with me again.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cBecause you will\nit, Master.\u201d From somewhere inside came the strength to grin, as if it were a\nyear ago and she had not yet begun to dream of being more than his slave, his\nsister\u2019s friend. As if they could still tease and talk.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

His mother laughed\nand patted his arm that held the offended document. \u201cIt seems she has made her\ndecision, my son. For now, at least. Perhaps we will revisit it in a few years\u2019\ntime, hmm?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Benjamin sighed\nagain and put the scroll back into the folds of his toga. \u201cDo you think she\nwill be any less stubborn at sixteen or eighteen? Because thus far it has\ncompounded with age.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

The mistress winked\nat her. \u201cIt is all a matter of what she has decided is right. Is it not so,\nlittle one?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

How could anyone\nhelp but smile in the face of Mistress Abigail? \u201cAnd of what the Lord wants of\nme.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cFor\nyou.\u201d The challenge rekindled in Benjamin\u2019s eyes.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cOf\nme. I am meant to serve him, not be served by him.\u201d It\nwas what they themselves had taught her, so why did they all stare at her so?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Abba shook his head\nand urged her back around, toward the villa\u2019s door. \u201cSometimes, my darling\ngirl, I think your faith is greater than any of ours.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

She chuckled,\nthough her father did not. \u201cYou are being silly, Abba. I only believe what you\nhave taught.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

He patted her\nshoulder as he led her back inside. \u201cExactly.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n