A Lesson in the Minutiae<\/strong><\/h1>\n
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For the longest time, words of a certain theme were associated with my first name. Meticulous. Mature. Hardworking. High-achieving. Serious. As the eldest child and only daughter in a family<\/a> of three children, I upheld a particular set of standards that soon became so ingrained that I hardly knew who I was without considering them. It took no longer than five minutes for anyone who interacted with me\u2014family or otherwise\u2014to know that the demeanor I portrayed likely indicated one trait overrode anything else about me: I was responsible. They were correct.<\/p>\n \n Like many people probably can attest to for themselves, my inclination toward responsibility began when I was young. I never minded putting away my toys, I always made my bed in the morning, and I consistently did what I was told. Whether or not this trait evolved from nature or nature\u2014or perhaps a bit of both\u2014it continued to grow throughout the years. I may not have recognized the deeper meaning of responsibility at a young age, but I was perceptive enough to know that being so brought about a positive outcome. My inherent quality of being mature for my age multiplied tenfold whenever I received praise for being \u201cso responsible.\u201d It became my identity.<\/p>\n While being responsible is a stellar trait to strive for, no one trait should define someone. In the same way that a person can struggle when an aspect of their life is the only one focused upon then becomes lost, there is too much pressure to live up to the expectations of a single quality. Consider the minutiae with responsibility<\/em>: there is a difference between being responsible (in general), being responsible for something or someone else, and having responsibility. What we do based upon those differences will influence whether we are successful, how we are perceived, and how we view ourselves.<\/p>\n \n Children are taught about responsibility from young age because the ability to be responsible as a child equates to greater success as an adult. They seek praise from the adults in their lives and derive their worth from it when they can do the same activities that their parents and caregivers do. Most of us, after all, wanted to be like our parents when we were young. Teaching responsibility to children is as easy giving them a few simple chores to complete and heaping on the praise afterward. Increasing the amount of responsibility to the appropriate level is important as children grow up. Just as we cannot be trusted to be responsible with scissors until we know which way to hold the ends, we cannot\u2014and should not\u2014be responsible for making life-changing decisions or handling higher-stakes situations until we have proven we can be responsible for the outcomes.<\/p>\n Scripture states that, \u201cWhen I was a child, I spoke like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I gave up childish ways,\u201d (1 Corinthians 13:11). This verse exemplifies the idea that we should acknowledge that everyone has a different level of responsibility based upon their respective ages. We need to respect those differences and ensure that our reactions to the responsible actions taken match what every person is capable of doing. When the time is correct, the person who is ready for the next step demonstrates they are ready for more responsibility in ways respective to who they are as an individual.<\/p>\n Today we often see this idea played out in sibling relationships and in school. As children mature, they are given more responsibility to be on their own. A family with multiple children may have the oldest sibling watch the younger ones after school. When teenagers are old enough, they may be allowed to walk home from school on their own or stay out a bit later at night. Of course, there is also the coveted responsibility of receiving a driver\u2019s license and driving alone. Every one of these actions is one earned by building trust between adults and children.<\/p>\n When I was in middle school, I began to be known among the neighborhood parents as the sibling who was responsible enough to watch other families\u2019 children before the adults came home from work. I was only thirteen at the time and couldn\u2019t drive, and most of my brothers\u2019 friends\u2019 parents, like our own, worked late hours and couldn\u2019t always get their kids to each other\u2019s houses for play dates after school. Being the \u201cmature\u201d young adult<\/a>, I found myself in charge of a slew of young kids for hours on end while I tidied the house, finished my homework, and attempted to ensure chaos didn\u2019t run rampant. I\u2019d proved early on that I was a responsible young adult, which led to me being responsible for others and having responsibility of the overall well-being of a situation. The more often I demonstrated I could keep the handful of polite yet rambunctious six-year-olds in hand, the more my reputation for being a responsible young adult grew and the more my confidence began to depend upon keeping that reputation going strong.<\/p>\n \n \n Twenty years later, I\u2019ve once again found myself responsible for a child, but this time she is my own. To say I\u2019ve learned a lesson about the level of stress that accompanies responsibility would not emphasize enough the pressure parents face to do it justice. I look back on my teenage self in awe that any parent would entrust their young children to the responsibility of a thirteen-year-old\u2014even a mature one.<\/p>\n![\"\"](\"https:\/\/readmedia.s3.amazonaws.com\/read\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/09\/19153025\/shutterstock_125053304-300x218.jpg\")
<\/p>\nThe Beginning Stages<\/strong><\/h2>\n
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<\/p>\nGrowing Up <\/strong><\/h2>\n
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